Alan Hello.
Noel Hello.
Alan Well, last week we showed you how to become a gynaecologist. And this week on ‘How to do it’ we’re going to show you how to play the flute, how to split an atom, how to construct a box girder bridge, how to irrigate the Sahara Desert and make vast new areas of land cultivatable, but first, here’s Jackie to tell you all how to rid the world of all known diseases.
Jackie Hello, Alan.
Alan Hello, Jackie.
Jackie Well, first of all become a doctor and discover a marvellous cure for something, and then, when the medical profession really starts to take notice of you, you can jolly well tell them what to do and make sure they get everything right so there’ll never be any diseases ever again.
Alan Thanks, Jackie. Great idea. How to play the flute. (picking up a flute) Well here we are. You blow there and you move your fingers up and down here.
Noel Great, great, Alan. Well, next week we’ll be showing you how black and white people can live together in peace and harmony, and Alan will be over in Moscow showing us how to reconcile the Russians and the Chinese. So, until next week, cheerio.
Alan Bye.
Jackie Bye.
Monty Python Episode 28
US Healthcare
Draw for yourself the following picture. You are standing, or walking across an intersection. You are the patient. Coming toward you at faster and faster speeds are cars. Each coming to you. We don’t know if they are coming to help, or just to get through the intersection before the other cars. Each car approaches from a different direction. These cars are recent models and expensive. A Hummer, Mercedes, Jaguar, and Cadillac.
Who do you hope is driving? Too bad. They are being driven by the drug salesman, the doctor, the lawyer, and the insurance salesman.
Don’t you wish the lights were working? Right now they are all green. Don’t you wish you had a better choice, maybe even a chance. The only choice you have is stay or go. This intersection is not for you. This healthcare takes care of those in the car, not those making their way from corner to coroner.
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