The compassionate prayers, meditations, and donations from friends and people I’ve never met have moved me beyond anything I could have anticipated. Many times I’ve donated prints or money to others who were in similar situations, but it never occurred to me that one day I’d be on the receiving end. I desperately wish we didn’t need help, but we do, as Teri has no insurance due to “preexisting condition”, and I support us on print sales. We tried for more than 2 years to find out what was going wrong in her body, but doctors wouldn’t see us because of the lack of insurance, even when I offered to pay cash! Finally a perceptive ER doctor referred Teri to rheumatologists, who send us to an oncologist. In all, it took 18 physicians to figure out her diagnosis. Now it’s too late to do anything effective to ameliorate her condition, except to try to minimize her terrific pain with narcotic drugs.
It’s Teri’s strong desire to die at home, and I fully support her in that decision. Two days ago, I had to go to the funeral home across the street and arrange for Teri’s inevitable cremation, which was the hardest thing I’ve ever done. In the midst of this I’m dealing with the most sorrowful, tragic feelings as I watch my dearest Teri pass. There are moments when I’m so overcome I fear going crazy. Most of the time my hands and body shake like leaves.
I want to express my deepest gratitude to each person who is helping, whether through prayers, kind thoughts, meditation, money, a hug, running errands or keeping Teri company. Your support has kept Teri and I from succumbing completely to grief and hopelessness. The financial donations are allowing us to relieve a bit of the financial burden, and hire caretakers to help as I was unable to sustain the intensity of 24/7 caretaking.
Thank you all, from the bottom of Teri’s and my heart,
Healthcare reform hit the Republic’s Reformationists and can’t help these people.
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